yeah. so that's how it goes. contentment never really reach me. I don't know why. i'm not even that hard to please anyway. i started feeling that life is full of nothing. i hate things more and more. i get tired even if i'm doing nothing, maybe i just wanted to do something.

I hate those person who think high of themselves, think that they're always right. so what if I look like this? you can't tell a person by how we looks. you just act childish that way.

argh.

i can't help it but feel like dying. as if it's the only solution i have. life just get worse when other's life is at best.

so much for these insecurities. life won't get better with that. stop envying them. just live or leave.

by asepdf | 10:13 PM | favorite | Probably meaningful | 1 said something

haha. looking at your sight really makes me feel envious. your words are so out of my world, yeah, I know you have deeper thoughts than me. as if your thoughts are as huge as the galaxy.

I'm missing you a lot, haven't been in touch with you for some time. and I'm hoping to see you, soon...

you've always been my idol, my goddess.

I've learned a lot from you, even though you don't know it. 

I treasured you since the day you've been important to me.

and now, I have someone with me, but still it's you who I want to be with.

*sighs*

this is wrong, and I know you'll never be mine.

well, the heck, I'll still be in your circles, and only if you'll allow it.

by asepdf | 10:16 AM | say anything?

it's been 3 weeks since me and my gf haven't seen each other.

yesterday I went to Cavite, and so we met.

we went to SM Bacoor and watched a movie, but we had a fight during the movie, it's so hard being with someone who's mad at you. I'm just not good with expressing apologies. We fought because of my goddamn phone, I just hate it when someone looks through my phone, even if it is her. I feel she doesn't trust me or anything. I'm not hiding anything or so. So why does she have to look through my messages. And it's all dated way back. *sighs*

I felt bad commuting my way there either, it's really traffic and the van's air conditioning is so hot. Going home is not as good either. It was raining so hard and I rode a jeep to Baclaran. I really felt bad that night.

Luckily, my friends planned to drink too last night. And because of my kabadtripan, I went with them. 

One of my friend brought some weeds, and it was my first time smoking weeds. Haha. I expected to get so high, though I didn't. 

Well it was a heck of a yesterday. Haha. 

by asepdf | 10:19 PM | say anything?